We Failed at Game of Thrones

A replica of the famous throne.  Picture courtesy of Wicker Paradise, although I see no wicker.  https://www.flickr.com/photos/wicker-furniture/9162528732
A replica of the famous throne. Picture courtesy of Wicker Paradise, although I see no wicker. https://www.flickr.com/photos/wicker-furniture/9162528732

Since I don’t live under a rock, I know Game of Thrones is a very popular book and TV series.  Plenty of people are more connected to the characters than they are with their own relatives, even though they seem to operate at the same level of dysfunction.  I have to admit that I am not the biggest fan of the fantasy genre, but I was willing to give it a go because George R.R. Martin put some interesting historical elements into the plot lines.  Maybe, just maybe this could be the exception I was looking for.

So the Boffin and I borrowed the first season of Game of Thrones from the library.  Ladies and gentlemen, we gave it our best shot…two episodes.  The problem was it had so many historical elements that the anachronisms and references made everything too distracting.  The Boffin and I couldn’t filter our brains and just get into what was happening.  Even Lannister and Stark are too close to Lancaster and York.

But what is even more annoying was that the acting and characterizations were very good.  So now I am left wondering what is going on with characters on a show that is unwatchable to me.  Catch-22, here I am. Now, I need your help.  Remember I only saw two episodes and am stuck in 2011, and I know there are so many more plot twists and characters that the writers added.  You can probably make stuff up, and I will believe it.  Help a gal out, please!

–  Does Sean Bean (Eddard) die like he does in every other work he is in?

–  Daenerys’s eggs are dragon’s eggs.  Does she sit on them to hatch them?

–  Does someone beat the crap out of Joffrey instead of just getting a slap from Tyrion?  I hope Tyrion has another go.  Throw Arya into it, and make it a Lucha Libre showstopper.

–  I am going to guess that Bran has no memory of what Cersei and Jamie were doing and how he fell.  Am I right?  If so, holy convenient plot device, Batman!

–  Does Catelyn ever grow up when it comes to Jon Snow?  You don’t blame the love child because of what the husband did.  Bitch.  And screw Eddard for allowing this to go on.  Dickweed.

–  Does Sansa get a brain transplant and get over Joffrey?  (You can tell how much I hate the inbred bastard.)  Or does somebody push her out of a tower too?

–  Does Tyrion find true love?  I like him.  I want him to be happy.  I hope kicking the crap out of Joffrey is part of his wedding festivities.

If you can answer these, you would certainly put my mind at rest.  Or you can just mess with my brain.

14 thoughts on “We Failed at Game of Thrones

  1. 1. Eddard dies at the end of his life.

    2. Dragon eggs make delicious omelets.

    3. Understand that Joffrey is the way he is because everyone hears his name and thinks, “What a good name for a giraffe.”

    4. Whether Bran remembers or not, how does anyone else know what Bran knows or not?

    5. Not only does Jon Snow know nothin’, supposedly we all know nothin’ about Jon Snow.

    6. There is a brain transplant involved in later seasons (I think – it’s not as if they show exactly how they did it), but it’s not for Sansa and it’s Joffrey. Actually, it has nothing to do with Sansa, Joffrey, or their betrothal.

    7. Define “true” love. Do you mean “true” as in temporarily pleasant but ultimately not out of character for the series as a whole? “True” as in a blend of mutual respect and loathing but an overall stable relationship? Or “true” like Disney movie “true”?

    Hope that helps – clear as mud!

    🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. 1. So I guess Eddard dies of diabetes-related complications?

      2. Never tried them. Do they pair well with centaur steak?

      3. I would think he would be pissed because his parents misspelled Geoffrey/Jeffrey.

      4. Bran could spill the beans, if he does remember. Kids are not known for keeping secrets, especially if they have questions about sex. He is going to want the protection of his mother.

      5. We could figure it out from the first two episodes. Eddard had an affair. Jon was the product. Catelyn is pissed. Jon may not know, but we know from the outside looking in.

      6. Is there a House/Game of Thrones mashup? My mind is really blown.

      7. True like a happy, stable relationship where you occasionally fight over having to entertain your creepy brother-in-law and sister-in-law.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I don’t watch it, but my husband does. He watched every episode in the first series 3 times just to figure out all of the different characters and what was happening. That’s way more than I want to invest in a tv show. I’d rather spend my time productively – playing endless games of solitaire. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  3. You really don’t want us telling you all this.

    I appreciate that you tried two episodes, but really, Game of Thrones takes more than two start sinking in.

    To hint at some of your questions… bad things happen to good people. Also bad things happen to bad people. (Eventually)

    There will be conflicts where you don’t want either side to win.

    People tend to wise up over time. If they live.

    Shocking stuff happens. REALLY satisfying things happen. Some things you don’t want to happen, they happen, and it’s cool from a story point of view, so acceptable.

    Some things are kind of unacceptable,and they are supposed to be that way.

    People you like, you might stop liking. People you don’t like, you might end up liking and be mad at yourself for liking because you originally didn’t like them.

    Am I being too vague. Sorry. I hope you’ll give the show a second chance.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I do. I really do. My brain cannot filter out all the different bits from the different countries and historical eras. The characters are credible, but the world in which they reside isn’t. It’s too maddening for me to continue watching.

      Like

      1. My advice would be to set aside a half-hour and look at:

        – The appendix from the first book – this will give you the cast of characters at the beginning of the series and what general groups everyone falls in.
        – The map at the front of the first book – this will give you the basic geographical layout of everything they are talking about.
        – The GoT wiki entries for the major characters you remember. But only if you’re the type of person that doesn’t mind spoilers!

        I wouldn’t set aside more than a half-hour because it can easily get overwhelming with all the detail. Use that time limit as a way to pace yourself without getting too drawn in. If you have a better understanding of the way the chessboard is set up at the beginning of the game, you might enjoy watching the pieces a bit more.

        Like

It's OK. You can say something.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s