When I checked in at The Bloggess, she posted a link to one of my worst nightmares.
It’s a Tumblr blog called Tinder in Brooklyn. For those who don’t know, Tinder is a dating app that allows you to chat with your potential date, and you swipe through photos to find somebody with whom you would like to chat.
Well, all I had to do was read the first 10 posts to realize how lucky I was to be married and to formally announce to The Boffin that he was not allowed to die. I will stick every single tube I can find into him. He will not be allowed to leave this planet. Cattle prods will be used to recharge his brain. I will turn him into a ventriloquist dummy. Anything to keep him going. Sorry.
Me: “I don’t care. I will haul your body to Jim Henson’s workshop, and they will reanimate your ass.”
The Boffin: “I hope they will reanimate more than my ass.” (Starts making ass spreading motions with his hands while blowing raspberries.) “I’ll be the $100,000 man. ‘Sorry, we couldn’t afford any more.’ Don’t think anyone will be able to tell the difference.”
Just don’t make me date again.