The Boffin Needs Another Name

“I need to talk to you.”

“What is it?”

“If I come up with ideas and it’s your job to carry them out, what are you?”

“Husband?”

“No, a henchman.”

The Boffin is like Odd Job from Goldfinger only more eloquent, worse dress sense, worse aim, and less Asian.
The Boffin is like Odd Job from Goldfinger only more eloquent, worse dress sense, worse aim, and less Asian.

The Boffin’s head goes into his hands.

“If that’s the case, you need a henchman uniform.  We need to replace your wardrobe with clothes that are all the same.”

“But I wear polo shirts and khakis all the time.”

“They have to be the same color.  It’s like in the movies.”

“So you want to live your life like in the movies.”

“You don’t understand.”

I get a stare of belief, yet disbelief.  After almost 14 years of marriage, I am immune to that look.

“You also need a new name.  The Boffin is not a good henchman name.”

“Well, why don’t you post about it on the blog and ask people to give me a new name?”

“I will!”

“I also only want to be a part-time henchman because you are not evil all the time.”

“You mean like call you on the cell phone when I need you to carry out my plans?”

“Yeah.”

“It would save me money on benefits.”

“Do you want me to get you a nuclear missile?”

“No, just build me a shark pond.”

**********

So, my dear readers, what would be a good henchman name for The Boffin?

22 thoughts on “The Boffin Needs Another Name

  1. Your henchman’s name should reflect the field of evil in which you intend to carry out your evil deeds…. World take-over, mere city crime-boss, or whatever it is; pick YOUR field (and, perhaps, name…), then it will direct you to a proper moniker for the henchman…

    Standard policy in comics and movies, from my observations… If I knew you particular brand of evil, I’d make a suggestion; hopefully the above helps…

    😉

    gigoid

    Liked by 1 person

    1. The thing is I am only Movie Evil. I really don’t want anyone to die or suffer. Plus, we don’t have the budget to commit any sort of evil on a grand Bond villain scale.

      My shark pond would really be those fish you see in spas who exfoliate people’s feet in shark costumes sewn by benevolent ichthyologists.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Gizmo is a great name for a henchman, especially if he is an engineer.

    BTW: My henchman’s name is Scooter. He will destroy anything I tell him too. He will also destroy anything I tell him not to: we are working on that though.

    Liked by 1 person

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